Am I Selfish?

After I gave birth (awhile back), I didn't receive any flowers or gifts. Just 1 card from my mom and sisters and congratulation emails from my in-laws and my cousins.


But whenever someone gives birth in the family, I go out of my way and get them something nice.


Am I selfish for feeling this way?

Am I Selfish?
No, you're not selfish. You do the things you do because that's how it should be. Unfortunately your family and friends don't do it the right way. Send yourself some flowers. When people ask where you got them tell them the truth. "I just gave birth to the most incredible little baby and felt I deserved some congratulations." Either they'll get the hint or they won't. Trust me I know plenty of people like this. Eventually you'll stop going out of your way for them and it's okay.
Reply:Sorry, I was too late to answer this one. Yes, ANYONE who brings a child into this world is selfish Report It

Reply:selfishness is a human thing...its not your fault...anyone in your position would feel the same way in some way or another
Reply:I don't think you're being selfish at all! It's perfectly normal to feel like you do and I think every woman would feel the same way...even if they didn't want to admit it.





If I knew you I would have brought you your favorite food to the hospital. That's what I wanted most was REAL food...





Congratulations on your baby...I hope you feel better after seeing that you're perfectly normal and NOT selfish one little bit.
Reply:No, your not selfish at all. You got them something nice so they should have gotten you something nice in return. Next time dont get them anything, their the selfish ones. Congrats on the birth of your baby and Good luck!!!
Reply:No, you are not selfish for feeling this way. I would be very upset if my family did that to me.
Reply:I can understand that feeling. You go the extra effort to make the other new mommies feel good and special. Whereas, when you're the new mommies, others don't treat you that way. I'm that way, too. I don't think it's really selfish to feel that way. You want others to treat you the way you treat them and when you don't get treated as well, it's disappointing.
Reply:Its not selfish at all. I find it rude. It would hurt my feelings. I would Just still continue giving them things; and know personally in your heart you are the better person.
Reply:no i dont think that you are selfish. I think i would feel the same way.
Reply:I know how you feel. I havent given birth yet, but at my baby shower, im not expecting hardly anything from people. maybe just immediate family. I remember on my 16th birthday, my parents threw me a huge party and only like 5 people from my family showed up. I was so depresesd, especially since two years earlier at my sisters sweet 16, they rented a community centre and had a guestbook and like 50 people showed up. I know that its frustrating, because its not the money aspect, its the fact that you went out of your way to help other people and be thoughtful.
Reply:Be Very Selfish. Give your gifts because they make you feel wonderful giving them. If you give them with a certain expectation of how they will be received you may be disappointed. If you give them with a certain expectation that the recipient will wake up and give back to in kind you may also be disappointed.





Your family may be unthinking, unkind or they may just be doing the best they can do.





I have four kids and know exactly what you are going through. There have been years when a card is all my husband and I could do and there have been times when we felt unappreciated for what we were able to give.





But it is much more satisfying to follow the Golden Rule "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you". It is a little bit like paying it forward. When you do something nice for something the world has a way of coming around and doing something nice for you - it may not be directly from the person that you did something nice for at all but it will come around.





Stay positive and focus on taking care of your baby and yourself. Be selfish. But don't get bogged down in a pity party. You will be rewarded for your good deeds - if for no other reason than you are teaching your child to be a good person.





Accept your family for what they CAN do for you and acknowledge their limitations. You will be much happier and a better mommy for your biggest reward - your new baby.





Have fun with that darling because in a blink they will be off to college (again I know - it just happened to me).
Reply:Yes, you are selfish.
Reply:You shouldn't have gotten them anything, that way you'd know not to expect anything.
Reply:You must be an ugly step sister. Is your name Cinderella?



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