What should I do in this situation?

After 38 yrs I met 34 yr old lady who is my ideal woman. She is similar to me and a very approachable person, she is genuine and I know she is on the same wavelength as me.





We are comfortable in each others presence and when I'm near her I really notice the comfortableness. I have never met anyone that appears to be into the same things as me and share the same personality traits.





Anyway she showed an interest so I asked her out and she said yes and then changed it to no. Months later it appearred it was still on her mind but she has pushed me away. I know we would get on well but yesterday I found out it was her work xmas party.





She was there with another staff member and kep putting her arms round the guy. I dont know if she likes him or he is just very good friends with her. There is some affinity between them.





What should I do? Walkaway or try and win her over? I don't want to buy her with flowers or gifts etc and I think it has to come from her.

What should I do in this situation?
Justin, you can't buy any decent woman with chocolate and gifts. She knows you like her but she may be attached to some other man at the moment. Who knows what the future holds, you may win her in the end, Good Luck!
Reply:Hello! I am in my twenties and I think you should tell her how you feel. If you don't, you will always wonder what if. Just talk to her and ask her how she feels. Ask her why she has been acting the way that she does. Hope this helps!
Reply:Go and get laid. If she really feels for you she will feel jealous and lay you too ;)
Reply:I always think - as you say - what will be will be. Still make it clear that you're interested, but I'm sure she is aware of that already. If she wants to be with you then she knows what to do.


It sounds harsh, but don't waste your time on something that could well be a lost cause. She seems to have no qualms about messing you around and not giving you a proper explanation, which you deserve.


My favourite saying is - 'Why dance with someone who doesn't want to dance with you?' It seems to work in most cases.
Reply:It is better that you have a heart to heart talk with her and ask her what she thinks of you. Also tell her as to what is in your mind about your future with her. If she says that she is interested in pursuing her future with you, then bury the one-off incident and get on with your relationship. If she is not interested in commitment with you, then you can either break off the friendship and move on in life or you two can still remain friends, with no attachment.
Reply:If you feel she is this special, don't walk away just yet, she may be building up to a relationship. As for the other guy at the party, he could be any one, not necessarily a lover, or potential lover. She seems to be sending mixed messages though, so just take it as it comes, or not as the case may be!
Reply:Take your time, do not rush anything like this. you never can tell by seeing her hug another guy. this person could be her brother, relative or just a very good friend. so do not dwell on that. if he is her boy friend she will soon let you know. but do not try asking any question at this point. let her think about this. and in this way make up her own choice to talk to you about it. just keep in touch with her and spend time around her. she will open up to you, even if it may take some time. I see this as if she wants to know more about you. when she feels you should know, she will tell you. but just have fun and enjoy being a friend with her. as they say, most good friends tend to change from friends to couples over time.





I can also tell you, I am happy to see, both of you have the same personality traits. in today's times, you never see much of that anymore. I am happy for you. Good Luck, and take care.
Reply:If this girl has any class she would want you to make a move and probably be somewhat assertive. If you keep testing the waters but never jump in, it looks like you're just fishing. And no girl want to be with a man who will take anything that bites. Sorry to use so many analogies, but you get the picture. Even if she is seeing someone else, ask. A man who will stick his neck out for the possibility of a good relationship is sexy and irresistible.



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